Bill Donohue wants offensive? I'M ON IT.

"...we are not pleased with the comments of the gallery’s creative director, Matt Semler... [who said] that our objection to [the chocolate Christ] display ... is the equivalent of a fatwa. Because we did not like the way the Roger Smith Hotel handled the decision to drop the display, we have no intention of contacting the 500 organizations that we alerted to this assault on Christian sensibilities to inform them that the exhibition has been cancelled."

So, in other words, because Semler called your assault a "fatwa" you're expressly refusing to call the fatwa off?

Bill Donohue, since I grew a brain I realized what a pile of desperate and depraved horseshit Christianity is, but at this point I'm really, really hoping Jesus returns in glory through the clouds and cuts your peepee off with a plastic knife. This is for you:

On Monday night or Tuesday every week,
Good Catholics shit out remnants of the LORD
(And piss His blood on Sunday). When they speak
Of transubstantiation, they afford
This mystery a singular esteem
They'd never stoop to give their fellow can-
Nibals in sondry londes, whom they deem
Unholy to devour the flesh of man.
But now I say, Good Christian men, rejoice!
That tired old wafer—what was that, Christ Lite™?—
Worked for your parents—maybe—but today,
The marketplace demands consumer choice:
Today we have Christ fricasseed, satay,
Or curried: Jesus saves, so take a bite!

Terry Gilliam, We Hardly Knew Ye. (Tideland spoilers?)

So I finally saw Tideland, on DVD, night before last. I guess the best thing I can say for it is that it defies not only genre but actual description. A cursory glance at the user comments and more formal reviews linked on IMDB confirms such: the one-line PLOT summaries, for Pete's sake, are wildly contradictory. Jeliza Rose "delves deeper into her fantasies to escape her increasingly strange life"? I seriously think not, but somebody else thought so. (Of course, that someone was also stupid enough to mistake heroin for meth, so I'm not sweating the outcome of any hypothetical argument.) ( I weep )